点评:I debated even writing a review, since this place is (thankfully) closing in a few months anyway. But since there isn’t a single review from 2026, it seems no one else is bothering to warn people about this place, and if I can save even one person from wasting their money on this Colossal Destroyer Of Money And Fun over the next few months, I will (it’s worth noting that the terrible reviews stretch back 19 years... so clearly the owners and management have long been aware their business is awful and just never cared – nothing has ever changed).
In short, this is the worst “attraction” experience I’ve ever had in my entire life. Do. Not. Go. There. You can’t imagine a bigger waste of money, or a more poorly run establishment. If you’d like more details, read on.
Let’s start with the astronomical cost involved. If this had cost me twenty bucks, I’d still be disappointed and think the place was trash, but I’d be like “okay, lesson learned.” Instead, it cost us $180 for two people plus parking, just to get in. That’s right, you pay $25 extra just to park there - evidently the $65 admission fee isn’t enough to cover that. And then there’s the lockers ($16 for a tiny slot that could barely fit my backpack) and absurdly overpriced, terrible food ($16 for a tiny burger that was essentially a slider made of cardboard).
Then there’s the fact that the place is 100% staffed by children. I’m not even exaggerating. Most of them appear to be 14 / 15 /16, and I definitely didn’t see a single person over the age of 18. Look, I get it, places like this hire seasonal workers, and those are often teenagers. But shouldn’t there be at least ONE responsible adult present? Somewhere onsite? A supervisor? Someone to make sure the children are actually, you know, doing their jobs? Spoiler: 2026 teenagers don’t give a F about anyone but themselves, and boy do these teenagers let the customers know it. In exchange for our $200+ we got sighing and eye rolling, glaring and barked orders, attitude and power tripping. How can you expect any establishment to function well when you have zero reliable staff or anyone who actually cares about their job? It was very clear that none of these children cared at all about the customer experience (just FYI to the staff – no one can hear a single word you’re saying at the bottom of the slides, given all the water rushing out - so maybe just save all the yelling).
Given the children running the place, it’s no wonder someone drowned at this park in 2016 (yep, look it up) because the lifeguards didn’t care / wouldn’t listen to guests’ legitimate concerns about what they saw.
Why only be open from 11 to 6, especially when you’re charging this much? Kind of feels like 9 to 8 would be more appropriate, especially since it’s light out until after 9:00 in the summer. Even if the park were great (which it’s very much not), it would be really difficult to get your money’s worth in such a short time, and when you’re mostly waiting in long lines all day, it’s hard to even get around to each slide once. I guess they need to close at 6:00 so all the child staffers can hurry home to stare at their phones all night.
We specifically picked a weekday so it wouldn’t be as busy, but the place was still absurdly packed, with huge long lines for literally everything – we spent so much time in line, we didn’t even get to ride everything. Given how awful this place is, and the high cost, I legit can’t believe how popular it evidently is. It’s not like there’s nothing else to do in Washington State, and a lot of them are free.
Within 15 minutes of the gates opening, all the deck chairs in the place had been “reserved” with people’s towels and belongings. They need four or five or six times as many as the very few they have available, especially given that there’s no grass to sit on, just hot pavement. Just silly.
There are, inexplicably, NO changing rooms onsite. So you have to go change in a bathroom stall, and there aren’t many of those, so you do the math (also, you don’t want to be doing much of anything in any public bathroom stall – gross).
The so-called ”wave pool” does not work. There are NO WAVES. And they close it altogether for extended periods of time for no apparent reason, forcing everyone to stand on the sidelines in the blazing sun. It’s a super packed wading pool, nothing more.
The “Raging River” ride closed two hours early, without any posted reason. We had looked forward to it but never got the chance, because of all the waiting in lines all day. We were raging, all right.
The entire park is covered in concrete, with almost no grass, and shade only in the upper part of the so-called amusement park, nowhere in the waterpark. On an 85 degree day, this alone made for a super unpleasant experience, especially since we spent 90% of our time at the park waiting in line in the direct sun. Maybe put up canopies over the stairs, if you’re going to force people to wait that long? No? That would make things too pleasant? Cool.
Why require a tube for EVERY slide? I’d much prefer regular water slides where you’re actually IN the water – it’s cooler, you go faster, it’s way more fun, and you don’t have to lug a giant tube up several flights of stairs (the glaring child lifeguards are NOT happy when they have one of their very-frequent shift changes and you are in their way on the stairs – sorry, I’m just standing here in the sun for an hour and paying your salary; my bad). I couldn’t believe there wasn’t a single regular water slide in the whole place.
Even given all of the above, the absurdly long waterpark lines were by far the worst aspect of this awful experience, and the wait times should be completely unnecessary, if anyone actually knew what they were doing (or cared at all about the customer experience). I have never witnessed anything so inefficient and poorly run in my entire life. We waited, on average, for 45-60 minutes for a ride that lasted 30 seconds. Why? Because the “staff” (children who don’t give a F) don’t keep the lines moving at all. They could be sending the next person down when the previous person is halfway down the slide, and there would be ample time for the person to clear the pool at the bottom before the next person comes out. This is how waterparks are usually run. Instead, they won’t even get the next person ready sitting on the tube at the top of the slide until the previous person is already out of the pool at the bottom. On the four-slide tower (Konga Slides), which has 8 spaces for tubes to be ready to go at the top, fewer than half of those were occupied at any given time. Since the bottoms of the four slides are completely separated, there is no danger of anyone colliding, so they could (should) all be running simultaneously. But no. Instead, they wait, and wait, and wait. They send a single person every four minutes or more. No wonder the lines take at least 45 minutes. It’s ridiculous. The delay between riders was so exaggerated and ludicrous that we actually started to wonder if the child staffers were doing it on purpose to show extra contempt for the sunburned customers paying their wages. Based on the general attitude we got from all of them, it would not surprise me in the least.
Do not go there. Just don’t. You will regret it as much as we did.
When I first heard the news about Wild Waves closing permanently after the 2026 season, I thought it was kind of sad. But now, having visited, I think it’s better for everyone that it gets bulldozed to the ground and turned into a warehouse. Adios.
翻译:我原本犹豫着是否要写评论,毕竟这家店再过几个月就要关门了(谢天谢地)。但由于2026年之后没有任何评论,看来也没其他人费心去提醒大家远离这家店。如果我能在未来几个月里帮哪怕一个人避免在这家“金钱与快乐的毁灭者”身上浪费钱,那也值得了。(值得一提的是,关于这家店的差评其实已经存在了19年之久……)显然,老板和管理层早就知道他们的生意做得糟糕透顶,却根本毫不在乎——什么都没改变过。
简而言之,这是我一生中体验过最糟糕的“景点”体验。绝对不要去那里。你无法想象还有比这更浪费钱、管理更混乱的场所了。如果你想了解更多细节,请继续往下读。
咱们先来谈谈高昂得离谱的费用吧。如果这次只花了我20美元的话……我依然会感到失望,觉得那个地方糟透了,但也会想“好吧,算是吸取了教训”。然而事实是,我们两个人光是进入园区就要支付180美元,再加上停车费。没错,光是停车就要额外付25美元——显然65美元的入园费还不足以支付这项费用。此外还有储物柜服务(一个勉强能放下我的背包的狭小空间要收16美元),以及价格离谱又难吃至极的食物(一个小得可怜的汉堡要卖16美元,其实根本就是用纸板做成的“迷你汉堡”罢了)。还有一点就是,那里的员工全都是小孩子。我可没夸张。他们大多数看起来只有14、15或16岁,我绝对没看到任何一个18岁以上的人。我明白,这种地方会雇佣临时工,而这些人往往就是青少年。但至少应该有一个负责任的成年人在场吧?就在现场就行,比如个主管之类的,负责确保这些孩子确实……嗯,能好好工作。他们在尽职尽责吗?剧透一下:2026年的青少年只关心自己,根本不在乎任何人。这些青少年也确实让顾客们深刻地体会到了这一点。我们花了200多美元,换来的却是叹气、翻白眼、怒目而视以及粗暴的命令,还有傲慢的态度和滥用权力的行为。当你连一个可靠的员工都没有,也没有任何真正关心自己工作的人时,还怎么指望这家机构能正常运转呢?很明显,这些孩子根本没有把顾客体验放在心上(顺便提醒一下工作人员:由于大量水流喷涌而出,在幻灯片画面下方根本没人能听清你们在说什么——所以还是省去那些大喊大叫吧)。
由这样一群孩子来管理场所,也难怪2016年会有人在这个公园里溺水身亡(没错,就是如此)。可以去查一下)因为救生员根本不在乎/根本不愿倾听游客们对他们所看到的情况提出的合理担忧。
为什么营业时间只从11点到6点呢?尤其是当门票价格这么贵的情况下。我觉得9点到8点会更合适些,毕竟夏天天黑得都要9点以后了。就算这个公园真的很棒(事实上它远非如此),在这么短的营业时间内也很难物有所值;而且一整天基本上都得排着长队等候啊。连每张滑梯都很难轮流玩到一次。我猜他们规定6点关门,是为了让所有年轻员工能赶紧回家整晚盯着手机吧。
我们特意选了工作日来,原以为人会少些,结果还是挤得要命,几乎所有项目前都排着超长的队伍——我们把大量时间都花在排队上了,最后甚至没能玩到所有项目。考虑到这个地方体验如此糟糕且价格又贵,我真不敢相信它居然如此受欢迎。华盛顿州又不是没什么可做的,而且很多活动都是免费的。
大门刚一打开不到15分钟,那里的所有躺椅就被人们用毛巾和随身物品给“占”光了。他们所拥有的躺椅数量实在太少,实际上需要的数量是现在的四五倍甚至六倍——毕竟那里根本没有草地可以坐,只有滚烫的人行道而已。真是荒谬至极。
更让人费解的是,现场竟然完全没有更衣室。所以人们只能在卫生间的隔间里换衣服。这类地方本来就没几个,所以自己算算吧(另外,也千万别在任何公共洗手间的隔间里做什么——太恶心了)。
所谓的“造浪池”根本不起作用,根本没有浪。而且他们常常毫无缘由地长时间关闭造浪池,逼得所有人只能站在烈日下干等。其实它就是个挤得水泄不通的浅水戏水池罢了。
“狂野河流”游乐项目提前两小时关闭了,也没有公布任何原因。我们原本满怀期待,但根本没有机会享受,因为一整天都在排队等候。我们气坏了,真的。
整个公园都铺满了水泥,几乎没有草地;所谓的游乐园区域上方倒还有些阴凉处,但水上乐园里则完全没有阴凉。在气温高达85度(华氏度)的日子里,光是这一点就让体验极其糟糕——更何况我们在公园里90%的时间都是在烈日下排队。或许应该在楼梯处搭些遮阳棚吧。既然要强迫人们等那么久,那为什么呢?不对吧?那样岂不是太舒服了?也行吧。
为什么每个滑水道都必须搭配一个浮力管呢?我更喜欢那种人直接泡在水里的普通滑水道——那样更凉快,速度也更快,乐趣也多得多。而且不用把笨重的浮力管扛上好几层楼梯。(每次换班时,那些负责看管小孩的救生员可烦透了,要是你挡住了他们的去路……不好意思。)我就这样在太阳下站了一个小时,相当于在替你打工了;怪我咯)。我简直不敢相信,整个游乐园里竟然连一个普通的滑水道都没有。
尽管有上述种种问题,但那长得离谱的排队队伍绝对是这次糟糕体验中最糟糕的部分。如果有人真正懂得如何管理,或者哪怕稍微在乎一下顾客的体验,这种等待时间本应完全可以避免才对。我这辈子从未见过这么低效且管理混乱的情况。我们平均要等待45到60分钟,才能体验一次仅持续30秒的滑梯项目。为什么呢?因为那些“工作人员”(其实是一群根本漠不关心的小孩子)根本不维持排队秩序。其实,当前面的人才滑到滑梯中途时,他们就可以让下一个人开始滑了;那样一来,前面的人就有充足的时间从滑梯底部的泳池中离开,下一个人也能紧接着滑下来。水上乐园通常都是这样运营的。实际上,要等到前面的人完全离开底部的泳池后,他们才会让下一个人坐到滑梯顶端的滑水圈上。在拥有四个滑梯的塔楼(Konga Slides)上,顶部共有8个可放置滑水圈的位置,但任何时候被占用的位置都不到一半。由于四个滑梯的底部完全相互独立,因此根本不存在人员相撞的风险。这样它们就能(应该)同时运行了。但事实并非如此。相反,它们只是不停地等待。每隔四分钟甚至更久才派一个人去。怪不得排队要花至少45分钟呢。这太荒谬了。乘客之间的间隔时间被刻意拉长到离谱的程度,以至于我们开始怀疑那些年轻的员工是不是故意这么做的,想借此对那些被晒得通红、正在支付工资的顾客表现出更多的轻蔑。从他们所有人的态度来看……我一点也不会感到惊讶。
千万别去那里。绝对不要。你会和我们一样后悔的。
当我最初听到“狂浪乐园”将在2026赛季后永久关闭的消息时,我觉得挺难过的。但如今亲自去过之后,我觉得对它来说,最好的结局就是被夷为平地并改造成仓库。再见吧。