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THE "AIRFORCE" IS GROUNDED.
Boons的点评
点评：BOONS HAND DRYER.
Status: Permanently Grounded (3 Months and Counting)
If you are heading into the gents at Boons after a pint of real warm ale and a quick freshen up, prepare for a historic exhibition. Mounted on the wall is the "Airforce" hand dryer, a piece of machinery that has successfully done absolutely nothing for three solid months.
At this point, it is no longer a hand dryer; it is a monument to structural stillness.
The Inaction: Waving your hands under the sensor does nothing. It does not click, it does not whir, and it certainly does not blow air.
It has been broken for a full quarter of a year. Seasons have changed, warm pints have flowed, and yet the Airforce remains firmly grounded.
The Alternatives: With no air forthcoming, patrons are left to complete the "Horbury Wipe"—the time-honoured tradition of aggressively drying your hands on the back of your jeans before walking back out to the pub's semi heated outdoor seating area or you can use the "blue roll" which after 3 months the amount of blu roll wasted will have GRETA THUMBERG'S carbon footprint calculator bursting into flames.
If you like your beer warm, and your hands dripping wet and your atmosphere subdued because of the landord who just hates you to enjoy yourself apparently then Boons is the place to be. Someone please call ground control; the Airforce needs maintenance.
Status: Permanently Grounded (3 Months and Counting)
If you are heading into the gents at Boons after a pint of real warm ale and a quick freshen up, prepare for a historic exhibition. Mounted on the wall is the "Airforce" hand dryer, a piece of machinery that has successfully done absolutely nothing for three solid months.
At this point, it is no longer a hand dryer; it is a monument to structural stillness.
The Inaction: Waving your hands under the sensor does nothing. It does not click, it does not whir, and it certainly does not blow air.
It has been broken for a full quarter of a year. Seasons have changed, warm pints have flowed, and yet the Airforce remains firmly grounded.
The Alternatives: With no air forthcoming, patrons are left to complete the "Horbury Wipe"—the time-honoured tradition of aggressively drying your hands on the back of your jeans before walking back out to the pub's semi heated outdoor seating area or you can use the "blue roll" which after 3 months the amount of blu roll wasted will have GRETA THUMBERG'S carbon footprint calculator bursting into flames.
If you like your beer warm, and your hands dripping wet and your atmosphere subdued because of the landord who just hates you to enjoy yourself apparently then Boons is the place to be. Someone please call ground control; the Airforce needs maintenance.
翻译：BOONS洗手间的干手器
状态：永久“罢工”中（已持续3个月）
如果你喝了一品脱热乎乎的麦芽酒后，想去Boons的男洗手间稍作整理，那可要准备好欣赏一场“历史性的展览”了。墙上挂着那台名为“Airforce”的干手器——这台机器整整三个月以来始终毫无作为。
如今，它已不再是一台干手器了；它简直就是“静止状态”的象征物啊。
实测结果：把手在感应器下方挥动，根本毫无反应。它既不发出咔嗒声，也不转动，更不会吹出空气。
它已经坏掉整整一个季度了。季节更迭，暖意融融的啤酒也喝了不少，但这台“空军机器”依旧纹丝不动。
替代方案：在无法获得气流的情况下……顾客们只能自行完成“霍伯里擦拭法”——也就是按照由来已久的传统，在回到酒吧里那半暖和的户外座位区之前，用力用牛仔裤背面擦干双手；或者也可以使用“蓝色卷纸”，不过用上三个月后所产生的浪费量绝对会让格蕾塔·通贝里的碳足迹计算器当场起火。
如果你喜欢喝温啤酒的话……如果你的双手湿漉漉的，心情也因为那个明显讨厌你开心的房东而变得闷闷不乐，那么Boons就是最适合去的地方。谁来联系地面控制中心吧；空军的装备需要保养了。
状态：永久“罢工”中（已持续3个月）
如果你喝了一品脱热乎乎的麦芽酒后，想去Boons的男洗手间稍作整理，那可要准备好欣赏一场“历史性的展览”了。墙上挂着那台名为“Airforce”的干手器——这台机器整整三个月以来始终毫无作为。
如今，它已不再是一台干手器了；它简直就是“静止状态”的象征物啊。
实测结果：把手在感应器下方挥动，根本毫无反应。它既不发出咔嗒声，也不转动，更不会吹出空气。
它已经坏掉整整一个季度了。季节更迭，暖意融融的啤酒也喝了不少，但这台“空军机器”依旧纹丝不动。
替代方案：在无法获得气流的情况下……顾客们只能自行完成“霍伯里擦拭法”——也就是按照由来已久的传统，在回到酒吧里那半暖和的户外座位区之前，用力用牛仔裤背面擦干双手；或者也可以使用“蓝色卷纸”，不过用上三个月后所产生的浪费量绝对会让格蕾塔·通贝里的碳足迹计算器当场起火。
如果你喜欢喝温啤酒的话……如果你的双手湿漉漉的，心情也因为那个明显讨厌你开心的房东而变得闷闷不乐，那么Boons就是最适合去的地方。谁来联系地面控制中心吧；空军的装备需要保养了。
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